JONNY RUBBISH

So-called comedian discovered and managed by Hugh Cornwell. Living In NW3 4JR (Anarchy In The UK), his first single, is a pisstake of the Pistols' debut and I wouldn't be surprised if he'd somehow used the original's backing track, it's that similar.

This is not the case, though, as Jonny points out:

I hope you are well. It was Jet Blacks 80th birthday on August 26th this year and he had looked up on your site the Jonny Rubbish write up, which I think is super. We wondered if you could just correct one thing, in the introduction it says "wouldn't be surprised if he had used the original backing track it was so good" - please could you correct that the backing track was so good because Rubbish and the producer Martin Rushing spent hours getting it perfect. I think this is only fair as Martin Rushent was a great record producer and died far too early of a sudden heart attack. All involved would be grateful if you could achieve this for the people involved All the very best.

Unfortunately, and I don't know about you, but like my comedy to be funny, and Jonny Rubbish more than lives up to his name on this stinky disc. I remain in ignorance of the merits of his second release, but if its title is anything to go by I shan't be tracking it down.

 

BONUS!! HERE'S JONNY RUBBISH, IN HIS OWN FUCKING WORDS:

Jonny Rubbish began his career when he met Hugh Cornwell of The Stranglers. They became friends after Rubbish's friend Jon Moss was in a support band [London] which played with the The Stranglers on the Rattus tour. They both enjoy the same sense of humour and Jon Gatward, not yet Rubbish, went on stage for the first time at Camberley telling an old joke about a public schoolboy who was asked not to masturbate in class. Jon continued to push Hugh to give him a chance to go on stage and Hugh agreed. Jon Gatward adopted the name Johnny Rubbish with the slogan that "He was Rubbish before Johnny was Rotten". That statement like every other joke that Johnny Rubbish would tell was not funny.

The first time that Rubbish appeared coming out of his dustbin, which in fact was a coal bunker, and was at the Roundhouse in Camden Town.

The Stranglers did five nights in the Roundhouse on their No More Heroes tour. Totally due to Hugh Cornwell's influence over United Artists, Martin Rushent agreed to direct and produce Rubbish's first single, which was called 'Mud On My Tyre', a spoof of 'Mull Of Kintyre'. Martin Rushent produced the most wonderful backing track, using such fine session musicians as Herbie Flowers. The United Artists legal team completely collapsed when Paul McCartney said that Rubbish could definitely not cover my 'Kintyre' with his own lyrics. The biggest problem we later found out is that Paul McCartney had thought of starting a hamburger chain called "Hamburger On My Tyre" and Rubbish had referred in his lyrics, completely by coincidence, of a similar project. Rubbish got his own back by shagging Paul McCartney's daughter from his first marriage in a graveyard in Hampstead.

Martin Rushent also laid down a terrific backing track for Rubbish's version of Rod Stewart's 'I'm Sailing' [sic] which was called 'I'm Boring'. Again, Rod Stewart and the owner of the music / lyrics would not allow it.

Rubbish also re-wrote the lyrics to 'Staying Alive' which he called 'Santa's Alive'. Again, Robert Stigwood this time would not allow the project to go ahead so it resulted in Martin Rushent to slightly alter the scam of the original and it turned out to be the most awful record anyone's ever produced or sung on.

The only people in the entire music industry in 1978, who would allow Rubbish to cover their song were the Sex Pistols themselves. It took a one-minute conversation between Rotten and Rubbish to agree that 'Anarchy In The UK' could be changed to 'Living in NW3 4JR'. The record is superb, the musical direction is awesome, the lyrics refer to the opposite of anarchy in the UK. It was at a time of high taxation in the Harold Wilson government and the title alone is a work of a comic genius. Living in NW3 - this is hampstead - 4, which is for - JR Jonny Rubbish.

Dumbwits still will not understand but its not for a comic intellectual like Rubbish to have to explain to pond life.

DISCOGRAPHY

Singles & Albums

Living In NW3 4JR (Anarchy In The UK) (7", 1978)

Santa's Alive (7", 1978)

Various Artists

England Belongs To Me Vol. 4 UK LP 2000 (77 Records): Living In N.W.3 4J.R.

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